Wayne Pacelle Has Officially Gone ‘Round the Bend

Wayne Pacelle, the CEO of the Humane Society of the United States, is someone with whom we seldom agree on matters of substance. And since he’s a devotee of the quasi-religious belief system that calls itself “animal rights,” disagreeing with Pacelle puts us in good company. Very few Americans subscribe to Pacelle’s philosophical view that animals deserve “rights,” at least in the way we all understand that people should have rights.

For most of us, learning the value of defending our neighbors' unalienable rights is a sign of growth and enlightenment. But for Pacelle, human rights matter no more than those of cows, pigs, chickens, and of every other species on the planet.

In several years of watching Pacelle’s comings and goings, however, we’ve learned that he’s not entirely consistent. For the right reason, his moral compass goes all wobbly. When HSUS needs to raise money, or when Pacelle pragmatically wants to avoid alienating his base with radical animal "rights" talk, he's quick to brand himself and his organization as seekers of animal “welfare” or animal “protection.” Words matter, of course, and those particular words are expedient means to an end.

But yesterday Pacelle did something entirely new. In a stunning gaffe worthy of Dan Quayle or Joe Biden, he opened his mouth and bent his principles in a way that will inevitably cost him considerable prestige. It may also cost HSUS whatever rock-solid bona fides it has as a well-meaning animal protection organization.

Speaking to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, Wayne Pacelle said the following about Michael Vick, the disgraced NFL quarterback whose stat sheet includes animal-fighting convictions related to the gruesome deaths of eight dogs:

I have been around him a lot, and feel confident that he would do a good job as a pet owner.

Honestly, we’re stunned. Aghast. Angry. (Almost) speechless.

The Newest HSUS Board Member Is Not Smarter than a Fifth Grader

Pity poor Jerry Cesak. The once-bright San Diego radio host has been reduced to “broadcasting” on the Internet, but at least he’s got his love for animals, right? Last week “Little Tommy,” one of the characters on his show, blogged about the newest Board member of the Humane Society of the United States:

Jerry is on this earth to protect animals.  In his home, he’s obviously a vegetarian, so there isn’t anything with meat in his refrigerator or in his pantry and you will not find a leather shoe or piece of furniture made from any animal.   Jerry has a fleet of cars and none of them have leather interiors.   Jerry will wear a 5 thousand dollar suit, but when you look down at his shoes, he’s wearing cheap almost plastic shoes—-no leather.

Let’s see: Vegetarian, plastic shoes, wealthy enough to own “a fleet of cars,” wears “5 thousand dollar suit[s].” Wayne Pacelle may have met his long-lost identical twin.

The odd thing about Little Tommy’s essay, though, is that it ended by noting that “Jerry shared a letter he wrote to all his close friends.” And there was a link to that essay.

But now both the link, and Cesak’s entire essay, are gone. Deleted. Zapped. But don’t worry: We have a copy.

Our favorite part of Cesak's "Dear Friends" letter? HSUS’s newest board member wrote (emphasis added):

Included in the long list of [Wayne Pacelle’s] remarkable accomplishments: HSUS membership has more than doubled to 11 million. That’s 33% of America.

Read that again. Not only does HSUS not have anywhere near 11 million members, but 11 million is definitely not one-third of the American population. It's not even one-third of California.

Wayne sure can pick 'em.

Trading Up to the SPCA

In June, Mars Petcare donated more than 12 tons of dog food to help dog and cat owners keep their pets in the midst of the Gulf oil-spill crisis. You might remember that HSUS piggy-backed along for the ride—donating less than three percent as much food through its vegetarian "Humane Choice" brand, “coordinating” the delivery, and claiming most of the credit.

But HSUS is apparently out of the donated kibble delivery business. Mars made another enormous donation today, and HSUS wasn't invited to the party. Instead, Louisiana SPCA volunteers are leading the charge to distribute the pet food in their own communities.

As it should be.